


i know you best

by BitterButSugaSweet



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentioned Lee Jeno, Mentioned Park Jisung (NCT), i dont wanna give anything away so, i made renjun suffer, im so sorry, tags wont be spoilers, turned into a multi-part story, was gonna just write a 2k quick fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:01:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23227501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BitterButSugaSweet/pseuds/BitterButSugaSweet
Summary: Na Jaemin knew a lot about Huang Renjun.He knew he liked his tea piping hot, he liked caramel cake more than chocolate, liked reading in his living room more than his room, liked to paint in his room but always forgets to open his windows before applying the varnish layer. He liked his plates neatly placed on the rack, but his cups haphazardly stacked atop each other.When you know someone for as long as Na Jaemin knew Huang Renjun, it becomes easy to tell when something was wrong.And something was wrong with Huang Renjun.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Na Jaemin
Comments: 5
Kudos: 34





	i know you best

**Author's Note:**

> hello! i tried to write in a way where you discover things along with jaem, so hope that kinda worked? 
> 
> enjoy!

It wasn’t so noticeable at first. Jaemin sat across from Renjun like usual, a comfortable silence settled between the two. They were sat in a small and cozy cafe, a cup each set in front of them, coffee for Jaemin and tea for Renjun. Their usual lunch ritual. Jaemin lifted his porcelain cup and sipped at it, the liquid caffeine still slightly too hot for him. He glanced at Renjun’s untouched cup of tea and then to him. Renjun stared at his cup, watching the steam rise up and disappear into the air. It wasn’t uncommon for their lunches to be quiet and peaceful, a nice step away from the chaotic lives they led. But something small gnawed at Jaemin’s conscience, he knew how much Renjun loved his tea piping hot. He didn’t want to say anything, and maybe he shouldn’t have, but he knew he cared about the other too much.

“You good?”

Renjun looked up, a slight confused look plastered on his face. “Um,” he started, eyebrows furrowing and the corner of his lips quirking in amusement, a short chuckle leaving his lips, “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” His features relaxed, hand reaching out to delicately bring his now lukewarm tea to his lips.

Jaemin nodded, “How’s things going with the boyfriend?”

Renjun set down the teacup onto its saucer gently, the contact making a slight klink. “Things are going good.”

“Cool.” Jaemin gave another light nod, elbow propping up onto the coffee table, jaw resting on his palm, fingers lightly supporting the back of his head. The two held each others’ gazes, “Still working on that project?” He offered a small smile, Renjun returned it.

“Yeah, probably won’t be done till a long time. The deadline’s kinda far but it’s a pretty big project, so I might start getting busy.” He sighed, “You still practicing for that competition?”

Jaemin hummed, “I’m actually not that worried about it.” He blew at his warm coffee out of instinct, taking a short sip. “Everyone in the crew’s been practising hard, even Jisung. I think we’ll crush it no problem.”

“Well then, bigshot, you gonna treat them to food after the win?” 

A wide smile bloomed on Jaemin’s lips, the bright smile that was all too familiar to Renjun. “I’m an angel, so I totally would, but” Renjun rolled his eyes, a grin betraying his annoyed facade, “treating us to food is Jeno’s job. He’s the oldest for a reason.”

“Poor Jen.”

Conversation comes easy between longtime friends, words exchange smoothly and fade away comfortably.

Soon enough, lunch was over and they bid each other goodbye with smiles and waves and “see you tomorrow”s.

-

Jaemin’s phone pinged beside him where he sat on the wooden floor of the dance room, breath heavy and a thin layer of sweat over his skin, hand clutched onto his water bottle like his life depended on it. He was planning to ignore it but a quick glance revealed who the message was from. Taking one more gulp of water, he unlocked his phone and opened the new message.

**Injunang:**

hey min, sorry but cant make it to lunch today

proj is killing me :/

maybe u could trick jen into buying u lunch

Jaemin just chuckled slightly to himself, it was such a Renjun thing to do- suggesting alternatives when he couldn’t show up for their plans. But Jaemin grew to appreciate that habit of his, it was his own way of apologising for his own absence.

it’s cool idm, but ur buying next lunch.

and dw i was alr planning to ;)

Changing plans comes easy between longtime friends, understanding was natural and no feelings were ever hurt.

-

Renjun did in fact buy their next lunch. He hadn’t intended to at first, but he had skipped the next subsequent lunches and felt guilty enough to buy for the both of them when he could finally make it to one.

Jaemin had his usual cup of coffee and a slice of his favourite chocolate cake in front of him, courtesy of Renjun. He watched Renjun quietly, the dip of his cheeks and dark rimmed eyes even more evident from the angle Jaemin had from Renjun’s downcast head- the boy staring at his warm cup of tea. Jaemin watched as his eyes darted left and right, constant half second glances at his phone on the table, its screen face up, the Moomin that he knew printed on the back of his phone case hidden from view. Renjun kept his gaze on his tea most of the time, but it was as if it didn’t even exist. It looked more as if Renjun was staring through the cup and at the table surface underneath it. He didn’t drink it while it was still steaming and he hadn’t ordered any food or pastry to go with it either, passing it off with a casual ‘I’m not that hungry’.

“You okay?”

He looked up to meet Jaemin’s gaze, rolling his eyes like second nature. “Just told you I’m not hungry, Min. Plus why would I willingly come out and eat with you if I wasn’t?” He finally sipped his tea then, but Jaemin didn’t miss his eyes shifting back to his phone for a split second while setting his cup down onto its saucer.

He discreetly pushed the food currently in his mouth to the side of his cheek before speaking, “You’re not really ‘eating with me’ if you’re not eating, though.” He continued to chew slowly, arms folded loosely atop the table, his fork resting carefully on his plate, its handle pointed towards Renjun, an open invitation for his friend to take some of the dessert from him.

A small scoff left his friend’s lips and his eyes refused to acknowledge the silverware, “Yeah, yeah,” he dragged on his words, “since when were you this sassy?”

Jaemin shrugged, swallowing his food, “I dunno, probably a while. Guess you just hadn’t been around to see me reach my final form- Sassy Nana.” Jaemin had moved into a dumb pose as he said it, his teeth poking out from his lips as he gave an amused smile. But Jaemin felt a sharp prick at his heart the moment he saw the guilt flash through Renjun’s pale face. It was a joke, the type that Jaemin’s always liked making, but Renjun had too guilty a conscience. Jaemin’s smile fell.

“Min,” He started, and Jaemin wanted nothing more than to cut in, tell him it was okay, but he knew it was better to let him get his words across, for Renjun’s own sake. “I’m really sorry for not spending as much time with you. The past week’s been rough.” His head dipped down, eyebrows creased with guilt, teeth chewing on the inside of his bottom lip. “Forgive me maybe?”

“You serious?” He couldn’t help the knitting of his brows or the teeth that poked through his lips. “It’s okay,” and it really was, “there’s nothing to forgive. I know how busy you’ve been lately.”

Jaemin picked up the fork, shoving one bite of cake into his mouth to chew, placing his fork down to rest on his plate once again.

He kept chewing but couldn’t bring himself to swallow as the guilt never seemed to leave Renjun’s face.

“Thanks, Jaemin.”

-

  
  


**OrangeLe:**

Sry hyung, was bz n didnt pick up yr call

Wats up

its ok le, everyones busy these days

just wondering cuz ur close to injun, does he call me ‘jaemin’ around u

**OrangeLe:**

????

Thats ur name tho?

lol

ik, i mean like

doesnt he call me ‘min’?

**OrangeLe:**

Oh yeah ig so

But me n rj hyung havent tlked in awhile so its hard 2 say

But im p sure he calls u min arnd me

Yru asking tho

it’s nothing, just wonderingg

It’s getting late, sleep soon le!

  
  


-

Jaemin scratched the back of his head, wondering if this was even a good idea. A translucent plastic bag hung by his wrist, the box containing two slices of cake with takeaway cups of coffee and tea balanced on top. The bag felt much heavier than they actually were.

He was still slightly sweaty from his dance practise, but he didn't pay it much mind. It was stuffy in the small elevator, making him feel strangely nervous, the slight vibrations of the metal box shaking him to the core.

The lift doors opened with a sharp ‘ding’ and he stepped out, his feet carrying him across the old, shaggy cream coloured carpet of the hallway, only stopping once he was in front of the apartment which he knew all too well. Quickly clearing his throat and self-doubt along with it, he raised his free hand to knock on the door- ignoring the doorbell which he knew Renjun hated with a burning passion.

It was a longer wait than usual. Renjun usually answered the door quickly when it was knocked unlike when people were to ring the bell- his personal display of distaste for his obnoxious doorbell and the ones who used it. Despite the wait, Jaemin stayed put. He was sure Renjun was home.

His effort was fruitful as the door opened and he was face to face with his friend. “Injunnie!” A bright smile sprung to his face like instinct to greet the surprised boy. “Afternoon!”

“Min?”

Jaemin’s smile faltered for a second.

Renjun’s face was even more hollow than the day at the cafe, his pale lips chapped. Skin seemed to hang off his dull eyes, an ugly bruised colour, his frame seemed smaller, skinnier.

Renjun wasn’t okay.

But it wasn’t in Jaemin’s place to play a role that was already taken.

“I brought lunch!” He smiled wider, walking forward, Renjun stepping to the side to let him. Eyes sweeping through the apartment’s living room, “Caramel cake and tea.”

Jaemin had expected Renjun’s apartment to be a mess, any sign to prove that the stress of the project was eating at him, yet the living room was as neat and tidy as always, not a single thing seemed out of the ordinary. He set the plastic bag down onto the kitchen island, bringing two of the cushioned stools closer together.

Renjun followed behind him, sitting on one of unoccupied stools and fiddled with his phone, but Jaemin could feel the gaze following his back as he unpacked the food, grabbing utensils from the kitchen as well. He transferred the tea into a microwaveable cup to heat it up on a low setting so as to not burn it but enough to result in a steaming cup of tea. After the loud beeps of Renjun’s microwave, he made his way to the empty stool, sliding into the seat and handing one of the forks he had grabbed to Renjun, placed his hot tea between the both of them and his own cold coffee next to himself. Renjun took the fork silently, bringing a small portion of his cake to his mouth. Satisfied, Jaemin started on his chocolate cake as well.

Renjun placed his phone down onto the empty space on the marble island next to his plate, giving a side glance towards Jaemin and his cake. “Aren’t you supposed to lay off the desserts till after the competition?”

Jaemin swallowed the cake in his mouth, smiling brightly at the boy “Aren’t you supposed to not question someone who lovingly bought and delivered food to your very door?” He watched as the boy just rolled his eyes. Just like always.

Renjun’s arm came up to rest on the cool island surface, separating him and his cake as he turned his head to face Jaemin properly. “I really did miss out on your transformation into sassy Nana.” Jaemin stuck out his tongue- clean, thankfully, and continued to eat away at his cake, the silence settling comfortably between them.

After a few minutes of silent chewing, Jaemin snuck a look in Renjun’s direction only to find him looking at his phone again. 

His tea had gone cold.

-

Jaemin was sat on the dance room floor once again, the polished surface was cool and a nice feeling against his legs. It was his last practise before their competition the next day and their dance instructor had ordered everyone to go home and have a long rest. They were also told to wake up and meet earlier to have more time to warm up for their competition in the afternoon.

His team had been working hard the past three weeks.

Jaemin had full faith in his friends to do well.

-

He had predicted it from the start, just from how hard everyone had practised, he knew that they would win. But it was still a surprise when their team was announced as the winner, his team- his friends, jumping up from their seats and hugging each other, cheering and shouting, a few watery eyes and running noses, but all smiles.

They did end up getting a late lunch treat from Jeno, though it was at a cheap diner as he had a limited budget. But they all sat and ate happily nonetheless, sharing their disbelief with starstruck eyes and dried tear tracks on their cheeks. 

Jaemin smiled wide and bright, the dazzling Jaemin smile. His teeth constantly showing for the rest of the afternoon. 

-

  
  


INJUNNIE!!!!

WE WON!!!

:)))

are you proud??

**Injunang:**

congrats!!!!

you guys srsly deserve it, u guys worked ur asses off

even prodigy jisung practised harder than usual

did jen treat?

hehe thanks injun <3

jen treated late lunch right after the comp!

**Injunang:**

bet it was cheap lol

ding ding ding!!

it was cheap diner food

but the victory made it taste better :))

**Injunang:**

haha dumbass

rude >:(

anyway!!

celebratory dinner?

**Injunang:**

sorry min :(

proj is screaming my name

dont think i can go out tonight

maybe ask hyuck or lele? theyre always down for food

aw okay then, good luck w the proj! :)

**Injunang:**

im sorry

srsly its ok injun

i dont mind, ik youre busy so go do what you gotta do!

go get that A+ dummy!

**Injunang:**

i

^oops typo, but okay.

thanks

rest well tonight :)

you too!

gnight injun

celebratory dinner another time, yeah?

**Injunang:**

yeah

sorry jaemin

  
  


-

  
  


hey hyuck wanna get dinner?

my team won the comp!!

celebrate w me :(

**Cute Chocolate Ball:**

Awh, sorry jae,, im not free tonight ;;

Why not ask renjunnie?

aw its okay!

n i asked injun alr but hes busy

oh wait ur still working on ur end year proj too?

**Cute Chocolate Ball:**

End year proj?

yeah, injuns been working on his so hes really busy recently

**Cute Chocolate Ball:**

Ahhh that proj

Were in diff majors so idh the same one he has

But nah im busy bc im at my parents

oh okay, np then

you think le will be down for dinner?

**Cute Chocolate Ball:**

If u treat then yeah haha

Oh yeah its been awhile, help me say hi to the park brat

haha sure

  
  


-

  
  


chenleeeeeeee

**OrangeLe:**

Yea hyung?

my team won!!

celebrate w me for dinner?

**OrangeLe:**

Ah hyung im alr celebrating w sung

Like rn

Sry :((

awww celebrating without me? :(

ur making hyung sad

**OrangeLe:**

D:

Noooo

Sry hyung :(

We thought u would b celebrating w rj hyung 

injuns been busy w the year end proj

so he cant comeeee

**OrangeLe:**

End yr proj?

What r u tlkin abt

???

the year end proj?

dont u know

You two are in the same class arent u?

**OrangeLe:**

Yeah we r but

Hyung the yr end proj deadline was like a wk ago

Sch ended last wk?

Jaemin felt his heart drop in his chest. School ended for Renjun last week. The week he brought him cake and tea. Renjun breaking before his eyes wasn’t because of a dumb project.

His outstretched legs folded in, crossing over as he sat up from his comfortable position on his bed, his body tense. He quickly scrolled through his contacts on his phone. He desperately felt the need to check on Renjun, but he knew if he were to ask through the phone he would just play pretend like he had been since the start.

  
  


Hyung

Pls reply

I believe in ur 7th sense for important and urgent shit

Do you still have all our spare apartment keys

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Jfc youre right i do have a 7th sense.

I just picked up my phone.

But yeah i do, why?

I need injuns key

Like now

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Renjun?

Jaemin youre not typing in lapslock. 

Please i need to talk to him but i doubt hell open the door for me

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Jaemin srsly youre scaring me, whats up?

Please hyung

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Did something happen?

Idk for sure but i have a really bad feeling

Its scary hyung

He looked so wrecked

Im worried

I really need to check up on him

Ik the keys are for emergencies only but

This is an emergency to me

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Hurry here.

-

He didn’t know what he expected to see when he opened the door. Too many dramas had imprinted themselves in Jaemin’s mind, he pictured books thrown everywhere, pages torn, the couch a mess, piles and piles of dishes undone in the sink and dirty laundry strewn all over the floor.

Yet when he opened the door, all he saw was everything the way it was last week. Maybe to someone who was visiting for the first time it would have seemed like the place was just nice and neat- extremely well kept, but the house was exactly the same as it was on Jaemin’s last visit. In a way, the house looked untouched, unlived in. Renjun must not have spent time in his living room after the lunch they had together. Jaemin frowned. He knew that Renjun liked to spend his slow afternoons in his living room with a book and a cup of tea, usually leaving his most recent reads on the sofa or coffee table. Without a project to stress over, it was odd to think that Renjun hadn't spent time reading and leaving books lying around in the process. Jaemin also knew he was a closed off person, someone who enjoyed privacy and time to himself. He loved everyone in their friend circle of course, but Jaemin always understood his need to get away from them sometimes. He understood his need to get away from Jaemin sometimes too. He gave the room surrounding him a final once over and Jaemin wondered if Renjun had been wanting to get away from himself recently. 

He bit his lip, a newfound fear burning like acid in the pit of his stomach, but even more than the fear was worry. He grabbed the metal door knob but hesitated, the last of his doubts making their rounds in his head, ringing loud in his ears, tormenting him.

He wasn't blind. Ever since he first saw the signs, a small part of him didn’t want to get involved. He was supposed to leave Renjun’s worries to his boyfriend, wasn’t he? He tried to ignore everything he saw, it was none of his business, it wasn’t his place, he wasn’t Renjun’s boyfriend. So, why? Why was he the one standing outside the door on a Thursday night, ready to open it instead of his boyfriend. Where the hell even was he? Was he in the room with Renjun right now? The metal of the door knob was quickly turning warm from the extended contact. He knew for a fact that nobody’s shoes except for his own were in the living room and bit his lip even harder.

His boyfriend wasn’t with him right now, so Jaemin would have to do.

He turned the doorknob, instinctively pushing it upwards as he turned it, the memory of its loud squeaking from being twisted otherwise etched into his head. Using as little force as possible, he pushed the door ajar to peek inside.

Jaemin was a strong person, yet he felt his heart breaking. 

The room was what he remembered, neat and tidy, with the exception of the art supplies that flooded Renjun’s table. Creativity always seemed to manifest itself in the room, seeping through the white walls. The room held nostalgia that shook Jaemin to the core. The fairy lights that he had helped put up one slow summer afternoon, the easel Mark and Haechan had bought him for his eighteenth birthday, the large Moomin plush that broke students Jaemin and Jeno had gotten for him sat in the corner, a watercolour set from Jisung in its usual place on his table along with the handmade card written in Chinese from Chenle. Everything was as he remembered, everything brought him back to the time years ago when all seven of them were in the same school, hanging out together at Renjun’s after school, doing nothing of substance. They would all squeeze together on the small single bed, knees knocking, lights dimmed with the curtains drawn in the middle of the day, soft conversations floating in the air. Nothing but good memories were attached to this room, hours upon hours of his life that Jaemin would never replace with anything else. In the same room, sheets pooled around a small boy on the same bed, the same small boy from years ago, his hair sticking out in every which way, sobbing, but forcing himself so hard to be quiet that he was choking, the only thing slowing his shaking were the sheets he gripped onto for dear life. The sound, dear _god_ the sound. The amount of pain in every sharp intake, every choke, Jaemin felt his heart ache, it was so out of place, it felt so wrong coming from this boy, from this room.

He pushed the door open fully, eyes meeting Renjun’s swollen ones as he looked up upon the creaking of the old wooden door. 

“Injunnie.” He walked up to the bed, the sobs from Renjun echoed loud in his ears alongside his racing heart. He was scared he would never forget them. They were the most awful things he had ever heard. He realised how much he had held onto the image of an always happy Renjun. The one who always smiled and laughed, always rolled his eyes and made snarky comments every chance he got. 

Jaemin felt helpless as the image was ripped away from him.

“Please don’t.” Tears never seemed to stop streaming down Renjun’s face, his voice was strained, his throat was closed up, he could barely get the wordsout. “Jaemin, please, leave.” He choked again, trying to force the tears to stop, as if the tears could magically erase themselves from existence. His eyes looked almost raw, an angry red that could only result from constant rubbing. 

Jaemin frowned, and Renjun wanted to cry even harder as he looked down, a feeble attempt to hide his face from view. Renjun wanted to push Jaemin out of his room, scream at him, anything to convince him to leave, to forget the sight of his crying face because it was easier that way. But the boy sat down on the edge of his bed, one leg folded atop the bed sheets so that he could face Renjun easier with that frown.

He reached out to Renjun’s hands, which clutched the bed sheets so hard that they had turned almost as white as them. Jaemin tried to gently release Renjun’s hands from the sheets, but failed to do so as Renjun just tightened his hold on them, head still downcast as tears fell freely onto Jaemin’s tan hands, teeth biting down hard on his lower lip, muffling his broken hiccups.

“Jaemin-”

“Stop calling me ‘Jaemin’. It hurts my feelings, Injunnie.” His tone was light and joking, but he kept his palms rested lightly atop Renjun’s hands, thumb gently running over the back of them. “I dunno about you but I like to think we’re too close for a first name basis.”

Everything happened like a domino effect. Renjun’s hands lost their grip on the sheets, his resolve cracking and everything seemed to crumble around him, fresh tears ran down his cheeks. Jaemin readily replaced the sheets with his own hands, trying to provide something stable for Renjun to hold onto. Renjun returned the gentle hold with a hard one, though it didn’t hurt, Jaemin frowned even further when he noticed his usually long fingernails were reduced to ugly stubs.

“It hurts to see you like this, Injunnie.” Renjun held back another sob, his throat making an ugly sound, hoping that the tears would just stop, “Please tell me what’s wrong?”

Jaemin could feel his own tears threatening to spill, the sight of someone he cared about this grief stricken was knocking at the walls of his own heart, but he knew he didn't deserve to cry. He had been so ignorant of Renjun’s grief, he had assumed that Renjun’s boyfriend would take care of everything, that he didn’t need to worry about his well being now that someone else would do it. Renjun had never been one to ask for comfort, in all their years of knowing each other, Jaemin had never seen Renjun shed a tear, never seen him this sad, this broken. 

Renjun shook his head, willing either his tears or Jaemin to go away. When neither seemed to happen, his body shook a little harder, hands trembling a little faster. Jaemin adjusted himself from where he sat on the edge of the bed, swinging his leg that was against the bed frame up onto the bed, crossing his legs and turning a bit so he could finally fully face Renjun, holding his hands a bit tighter.

-

  
  


**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Hey

Hows Renjun?

sleeping

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Okay, its late, are you crashing at his?

dont really have a choice rn

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Knowing Renjun,

We probably shouldnt visit until hes feeling better right?

yeah i think thatd be best

and the others cant know either

can i hold onto the spare key for now?

**Kuri Kuri Lee:**

Wont tell a soul

Keep it for as long as you need.

  
  


-

Jaemin enjoyed cooking, so making breakfast wasn’t a problem for him. After his night on the couch, he made a scan of Renjun’s kitchen and, seeing almost nothing of substance, did a quick morning grocery run. He guessed that Renjun probably wouldn’t be able to stomach much after the past few weeks of what Jaemin assumed were spent barely eating. So now Jaemin stood in the kitchen, making one pancake for the boy and three for himself. He placed both plates on the marble island, a bottle of maple syrup in between. He made himself a cup of coffee, dumping an estimated amount of sugar and held back on the milk. He set it down next to his plate of pancakes before moving to start on making Renjun’s tea, relieved that the store he visited still had the brand that he liked on shelves. He placed two bags into the cup and left some water in the electric kettle to boil.

Smiling to himself lightly, he moved down the hall towards Renjun’s room, a small tugging feeling gripped at his heart, his nerves getting the better of him. He stood in front of the door, releasing a quick breath before deciding to just open it.

And in his room was Renjun, sat up, back against the headboard, fiddling with his phone on his blanket covered lap. Jaemin much preferred this to the Renjun he found yesterday. He was so focused on the screen of the phone that he didn’t notice Jaemin’s entrance until a soft “Injun-ah” filled the quiet room.

Renjun looked up from the black screen, a look of slight surprise taking residence on his face. “You're still here?” He seemed nervous, index finger unconsciously scratching at the edge of the tempered glass of his phone.

“Well, yeah, dummy.” He gave Renjun a small smile, “How long have you been awake?”

“A few hours, maybe.”

Jaemin’s eyebrows shot up before he could even get the chance to control his reaction. “A few hours? And you didn’t hear me making breakfast? I'm pretty sure I slammed a few cupboards by accident.”

Renjun just continued to scratch at the glass relentlessly, the redundant action doing nothing to rid himself of his obvious discomfort, “Busy thinking, I guess.”

Jaemin had decided the night before to no longer ignore his gut feelings, and his immediate conscience told him something was off. “Well, enough of that, come out and let's have some breakfast, made by yours truly.” He offered a warm smile, opening the door wider. Renjun seemed to relax the tension in his shoulders as Jaemin made no move to question him on the night before. The both of them knew they would have to address it sooner or later, but Jaemin decided that Renjun needed some space- and breakfast.

Jaemin lingered by the doorway as his friend sluggishly got out of bed, slowly but successfully untangling himself from his sheets. Once he was sure Renjun was going to leave his room, Jaemin turned back and made his way back to the kitchen, where the kettle sat. The water hadn’t boiled just yet, the loud whirring sound coming from the device being a solid indication of that. He leaned his behind against the counter next to the kettle, watching as Renjun emerged from the hallway, feet dragging themselves to the stool meant for the smaller of the two meals. To his delight, Renjun picked up the fork, albeit slowly, and began cutting out a small portion, making a move to eat it.

“Injun, what the hell?” Jaemin pulled the most victimised expression he could as Renjun looked up from the sudden outburst. “What are you, uncultured? There’s syrup right there!” He pouted and Renjun rolled his eyes, a small smile pulling on the corners of his lips. Just like always. Renjun reached for the bottle of syrup and Jaemin felt the heavy atmosphere lifting slightly.

The kettle beside him made a loud click, so he turned to switch off the kettle’s power outlet before grabbing its handle and pouring it into the ceramic cup, watching the steam freely rise up into the air around it. He made no move to jostle the tea bags, knowing that Renjun preferred to do it himself. A smile wormed its way onto Jaemin’s face as he brought the cup to the table, receiving a small ‘thanks’ and taking his own seat next to Renjun, a mix of relief and glee swelling in him upon seeing only one third of the pancake left on Rejun’s plate. 

He sipped at his own coffee, sparing another glance in Renjun’s direction, and although not sure as to why, felt satisfied to not see his phone anywhere on the kitchen island.

-

“Thanks, Jaemin.”

Jaemin startled upon hearing his own name, head turning to face Renjun. The two had been sitting on the couch, shoulder to shoulder, finishing the rest of their drinks in a peaceful silence. Jamein furrowed his brows but smiled nonetheless, “You’re welcome?” Renjun held his cup in his lap, a calculating look in his eyes as he stared at the TV. He looked so concentrated that Jaemin wondered if he had actually said anything. “What for?”

Renjun fiddled with the cup more, the pads of his fingers tapping lightly at the sides. His lips parted to speak, but he breathed out softly instead. Sealing his lips once more, his gaze slowly left the lukewarm tea to focus on the blank TV screen before trying once again. “Yesterday was-”

“Uh-uh,” Jaemin interjected, bending forward from where he sat to gently place his own cup on the coffee table, “If you feel like you owe me an explanation, don’t.” His tone was quiet as he leaned back into the couch, jostling his friend’s shoulder ever so lightly. “I did it ‘cause you’re my friend. If you don’t think you’re ready to tell someone about what’s troubling you then don’t.” Neither of them looked at each other, the topic feeling too intimate, too vulnerable. “No one is entitled to know about our problems just because they did something as fundamental as being a good friend.”

Jaemin couldn’t see it, but Renjun rolled his eyes slightly. “Shut up, I’m telling you because I want to. Stop getting all philosophical on me.” There was a long pause as Jaemin decided not to retaliate, giving Renjun some time to think over what he wanted to say. “Yesterday was kind of stupid honestly. It’s all kind of stupid. I- I’m over it now, I don’t mind talking about it.”

Jaemin snuck a side glance, but the sight of welled up tears had him reverting his line of vision. His gut told him that Renjun was not over it.

“Well, long story short- I got cheated on.”

**Author's Note:**

> wow i cant believe i havent written in like 2 years... thats insane? well i found this in my documents and was like 'wait i never posted this?' and realised it wasnt finished... so i touched it up, edited a few things here and there and started on the continuation! hopefully ill be able to finish this story by next week? im a bit busy and my writing is really rusty so hopefully i dont disappoint...
> 
> i also started on my other stories again because i felt motivated to continue one of them haha.
> 
> bye! hope you enjoyed!
> 
> All reviews are greatly appreciated!


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